Tikriausiai būtent taip reikėtų aprašyti tą būseną. Po kelionės nurautu stogu, perkrauta smegenine, perpildyta širdimi maklinėju pakampėmis ir bandau nusitverti už oro, žmonių, namų, knygų. Tik kad jie visai ne tokie kaip Maskvoje – vėsesni, tuštesni, per garsiai aidintys. O gal tai susiję su kelionėje mielo žmogaus papasakota miela istorija apie vėluojančią, atsiliekančią keliautojo sielą? Tikriausiai kol maniškė klykdama blaškėsi po Beloruskij vokzalą, mano nuovargio ir liūdesio komos ištiktą kūnelį Aerofloto lėktuvas parskraidino namo. Tikiuosi, kad taip ir buvo, tikiuosi, mes šiandien jau susitiksim, kur nors, gal net Arklių gatvės apylinkėse.
Ir jau tada ji papasakos visą tiesa apie “Auksinę kaukę 2012” – kiek ten to aukso likę po medicininiais tvarsčiais, ant drastiško kosmetinio remonto ištiktos visuomenės, šalies, miesto veido. Tikiuosi pašlovins ir jaunųjų Rusijos teatro didžiavyrių Konstantino Bogomolovo, Jurijaus Butusovo, Mindaugo Karbauskio menines kovas bei gi klajones. Prisimins ir savo blaškymusis auksiniame rusiško teatro trikampyje – Majakovskio teatras- MCHAT’as – Satyrikonas, bei klaidžiojimus teatrų Doc, Praktika tuneliuose ir pusrūsiuose. Gal net ir pravirks, lydyto aukso ašaromis, karčiais meilės žodžiais minėdama Konstantino Bogomolovo spektaklį “Lyras. Komedija”. Spektaklį dėl kurio į Maskvą ir atgal verta būtų ir pėsščiomis nukeliauti. Nes tokia teatrinė piligrimystė atpirktų 10 metų beprasmiškos teatrinės kasdienybės.
Spektaklio “Lyras. Komedija” posteris
O gal grįžti visada tam, kad pasidalintum, paskleistum gerąją arba blogąją naujieną, permąstytum įvykius prieš ir po, pasidarytum išvadas? Tai dalinuosi – tona knygų apie teatrą – jei tik gims noras pasiskaityti kurią nors iš mano partemptų – geriausių lenkiškų pjesių, geriausių prancūziškų pjesių, geriausių pastarųjų trijų metų rusiškų pjesių – maloniai prašom! Gera naujiena – geriausio šiuolaikinio teatro klodai glūdi Maskvoje, bloga naujiena – mes vis dar linkę galvoti, įsivaizduoti, kad užtenka pasidomėti lokaliais teatriniais pirstelėjimais paryžiuose ar londonuose ir tapsim tokie cool, tokie laisvi, išsivadavę nuo bendros praeities, bendros ateities, genetinės, dvasinės, intelektualinės bendrystės, chaaa 😀 o išvada, moralas – gal po metų, kai ateis metas pjauti tai, kas pasėta…
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